Stressors Of Being A New Father And How To Manage

Introduction

Congratulations! You’re on your way to becoming a father! How do you feel? Happy? Excited? Stressed? Nervous? Frightened? Angry? Mixed? Maybe it’s also a bit daunting? Or maybe you don’t really feel much – or anything – yet, and that’s fine.

Many men experience various emotions before and when they first become fathers. It’s natural. What matters most at this point is that you’re here and open to thinking about what this all means to you.

If you are here reading this article, then congratulations on being a new father! Irrespective of if you are here for some advice for yourself or a loved one, at the end of this article, you will surely feel more educated and aware of the highs and lows of fatherhood! Here are some common triggers in being a new father and how to manage these issues and truly enjoy your fatherhood!

Common Stressors Of Being A New Father

1. Life changes

Bringing a new member into your family ought to bring drastic changes to your lifestyle. You may experience stress and frustration over losing your old life. And if you are a new father, these changes can be more jarring. However, there are ways you can manage this adjustment period. How can this be done you ask?

• Talking to other dads or parents about the difficulties or challenges that you might be facing.
• Search for support groups to share your experiences of being a new father.

2. Guilt about bonding

Fathers often find it difficult to bond with their infants. As newborns spend most of the time with their mothers, be it for carrying, coddling, or breastfeeding.

Fathers often miss out on a lot of direct contact with the baby. This is why they have a hard time feeling close to their kids. Now, how to deal with this guilt? Try not to be too hard on yourself and think of ways how to tackle this issue. It is completely normal to take weeks or even months to develop an emotional bond and connection with the baby. Also, there are plenty of ways to grow a strong connection.

3. Make contact

Letting the baby snuggle against your chest and hear your heartbeat is a great way to initiate a bond.

4. Speak to your baby

If you spoke to your baby inside the womb, they are likely to recognise your voice. Continue speaking to them. You can also try singing or reading a book. It helps the bond grow stronger.

5. Spend alone time with the baby

Spending some alone time with the baby will help you bond and also give your partner a much-needed break from all the chores. You can bathe your baby, feed the baby (if the baby is not exclusively breastfeeding) and carry the baby while doing light tasks.

6. Changes in the relationship with your partner

Welcoming a child home can often change your relationship with your partner, as you don’t get enough time to spend together. In addition, all the baby duties can leave you both sleep deprived and tired, resulting in some bickering. All this is quite normal, but you can take small efforts to manage this problem.

• It is important to acknowledge the changes in the relationship and communicate with one another. This will help avoid misunderstandings.
• Making efforts to talk to your partner, either when taking a stroll with the baby or taking some time off to check in on the other can be of great help.

7. Anxiety of parenting

With becoming a new father, it is normal to deal with the fear that you may make mistakes. Experiencing doubts and feelings of inadequacy is also completely normal. However, when this anxiety sets in, it can be hard to gather the mental strength to do your daily tasks.

Being informed and aware of what is expected of you when you become a new father can help a great deal. Familiarise yourself with the basics of child care. Here are a few examples; like how to

• Hold the baby
• Change diapers
• Burp the baby
• Swaddle the baby
• Bathe the baby

You can always take classes, watch tutorials and read books on parenting to help you. Learning the basics will help you feel more confident and more in control of the situation.

8. Feelings of isolation

Being caught up in baby duties and new responsibilities can make people feel lonely or isolated from the outer world. In addition, new fathers may feel as if they are losing their identity and social circle, all these feelings are valid and normal. How to manage these feelings?

• Take time off for yourself to do things that bring you joy.
• Take turns to watch the baby. It can give you and your partner the time off that you need. You may find it hard to do this, or even feel guilty, but taking care of yourself will help taking care of your child better.

Conclusion

Major life transitions are often difficult to navigate. It is normal to feel overwhelmed with all the feelings and responsibilities of a new father. You don’t have to feel guilty for feeling this way.

A study published by the University of Southern California has proved that fatherhood changes men’s brains. The changes were observed when a brain scan was conducted with the help of MRI scan. So, you are bound to experience these changes. Becoming a new father can be exciting and equally challenging. But seeking advice on how to navigate fatherhood and become a good father is the first step in that direction.

Remember, taking care of yourself will help you give the baby all the care they need. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help at any point if you feel the need to.